A change is necessary.
A huge shift, altering current path or life direction.
A change that blocks the ability to go back, make it impossible even if I want to.
But also, a change so powerful I don’t want to go back even if I could.
This is not a physical or emotional – this is Spiritual Revolution.
A complete deconstruction, from the core out.
In internal coop in which Spirit takes hold and Ego submits and willingly turns the governing of Self, of life over to my Soul – the essence of Spirit which exists within me….
…only, its not really a coop, because my life has always belonged to my Soul. And, now she’s getting it back!
This shift is impacting and altering my love language; creating the capacity for me to express myself more compassionate without losing the clarity of the message.
A compassion I didn’t even know I was capable of showing, having, experiencing…giving to other…giving to myself.
A compassion that is authentic, and true, and devoid of snark and bite that was planted during years of abuse and grew into bitterness that developed and honed as I felt the need to be authentic both in my messages to those I loved, even myself, as well as the warrior deep inside that helped me to survive over and over and over again.
Its been along interesting journey. One that started well into the middle of last year, initially with my views on Spirituality.
I deconstructed a lot of the truths that had been ingrained in my youth, creating various fears and blockages of my gifts at an early age, providing new grounds and creating space for them to expand.
It’s been a long journey, with multiple beginnings, may of them initiated myself as I peaked on mountain and had energy and desire to search out the next one.
I spent some time recently with the King/Father of Cups card popping up and it took me a while to recognize the ultimate message being I could still honor that warrior within and be tenderhearted at the same time. A message culminated with some recent relationship shifts that had me contemplating my usual approach and learning the very message of the King/Father of Cups and the capacity of compassion possible with Ego is removed and Spirit resides within, without.
I’ve been rebuilding since the Tower first danced across my alter last year; it shows up less often, but I do feel its recent visit was a reminder that I’ve come so far, I’ve built so much after the initial deconstruction took place.
And, honestly, from a deep, Spiritual point of view, the Tower is destined to come back…because I’m always open and desiring to be better, more.
(Deck pictured: Wild Unknown by Kim Krans)